A strictly forbidden learning experience....

    My journey into the world of martial arts has been interesting, as well as educational, to say the least. I have often been the lone female in a testosterone filled environment, but I've gotten used to it. I've even learned to enjoy it, but that's probably because I'm a natural born flirt.

    However, I love training with other women, and I am fortunate to be in a school where there are several other women who train. Women seem to have a natural ability and spirit, which is something my Sensei told me during the three years that it took him to get me on the mat. I didn't believe him then, but I certainly do now. I just wish more women would train in some form of martial art, but I know how intimidating it is to walk into a male dominated Dojo. .

    Which is why I began teaching self defense classes for women only. It's a lot less intimidating for women to enter a safe and fun environment, learn from another woman who's been around the block a few times, and also knows her way around the mat. It's an idea that came to me early in my training, and something that developed through the years.

    During the course of my training, I became acquainted with a group of men that practice an art that is different from mine but has similar roots. I've been invited to their seminars and workshops and have attended several of them. Even though I was from another discipline, I was always invited, and they continue to update me on upcoming events.

    Since they always keep me in their circle I sent them my information regarding my women's self defense classes. I thought they might be interested in what I was doing, and I'm sure they know plenty of ladies who would like to learn a few things to protect themselves. I received a terse response from one of their instructors.

    He told me, "Well, we don't have any women students, and I do teach men and women." I giggled. If they have no women in their school, how could he possibly teach them? And, if they did have women in their school, why would those women need of a basic self defense class? That's just silly. Then I wondered why they didn't have any women in their school.

    He informed me that the lineage of our arts are different. Of course, I've always known that. So has he. He concluded by telling me that while he has the utmost respect for my art, he must follow directives which strictly forbid cross training between us. Yikes! I wish I had known that before I took their training seminars. If I had known I was engaging in an activity that was strictly forbidden, I would have enjoyed it more. It would have been even more fun, and I would have felt a little naughty.

    I guess the flow of information is a one way street. How disappointing. Even more disappointing is the women who may have benefited from just a few classes who will now never receive this information. I understand that he was trying to protect his territory. But, he doesn't understand is that I am trying to protect women. Or at least teach them how to protect themselves.

    The ability to learn how to defend yourself should be easily and appropriately available to everyone, regardless of their age, gender, level of ability and personal belief system. We should be encouraging those who are vulnerable to find their power and strength, not holding them back because some one's ego got in the way.  Hmmm, maybe that's the reason there aren't any women in their school.

    Opportunities to learn are everywhere. Each one should be supported and celebrated rather than discouraged or tossed aside. No learning opportunity should never be strictly forbidden, for anyone, but especially to those who can benefit the most.    

 

Be healthy, and keep learning!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

The Debut of The Delicate Dojo....

    I began my martial arts training ten years ago under the instruction of Sensei Marc Hanson of Kusa Dojo. My goal was to take a few classes, learn a few techniques, and then move on with my life. After all, I'm kind of prissy, and I couldn't see myself hanging out in a Dojo with a bunch of sweaty men for very long. Besides, I'm a dancer, and I certainly didn't want anything to interfere with my ballet classes. And, I was terrified of getting hurt.

    I met my Sensei three years before I started my journey into the world of martial arts. He was my acupuncturist, and for three years he tried to get me into his classes and onto the mat. For three years I refused. I finally capitulated, thinking I would take a few classes, and he would see how much I hated it. Then I could say, "I told you so," I could quit, and he would stop nagging me.

    But, something funny happened. I fell in love with training, and I fell in love with the art. However, I understand how hard it is for a woman to walk into a testosterone infested Dojo. Even though I already knew my teacher and some of his students, it was terrifying. I don't know why I kept going to class. It may have been my love of the art, my incomparable stubbornness, or the fact that I didn't know any better. Obviously, I was getting something out of it.

    It was early in my training that I had the inspiration for The Delicate Dojo. In my imagination, this would be a place where women could learn basic self defense skills, instructed by a woman, in a fun, safe and comfortable environment. Of course, in my fantasy world, these classes would be taught by someone who had a lot of spirit, who loved teaching, and who absolutely loved helping women tap into their Warrior spirit. I had no idea that woman would be me.

    The time has come. Who knew that my fantasy would become a reality, and I would be the teacher. It's funny how things work out, once you stop resisting the inevitable and let nature take it's course. Welcome to The Delicate Dojo, and discover that it is possible to look like a woman, act like a lady, move like a Ninja, and think like a Warrior. See you on the mat!



Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP