Self employed, self respect, and the measure of success....

   
    Being self employed provides a rare and wonderful opportunity to unleash your creativity and express yourself through your work, without the constraints of a boss, co-workers, productivity demands, staff meetings, etc. It's wonderful, and I love it. However, along with the freedom, flexibility, creativity and job satisfaction comes the understanding that you are always "on the job," 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

    When I am not working directly with clients, I am working on marketing, networking, budgeting, short term goals, long term goals, organizing lessons, classes and workshops. I am constantly taking continuing education and advanced trainings. Vacations are a distant memory. There is no such thing as sick days or paid time off. There is no benefits package. When you are self employed, you don't measure success by how much money you make. You measure it by the satisfaction it brings to you.

    Most people are impressed when I say I'm self employed. But, sometimes I get a different response. Recently a friend asked me about my business. Before I could begin she interrupted me and said, "Well, it doesn't affect you and your husband." Confused, I asked her what she meant. "You don't have to make any money. If you do, it goes right back into the business." I explained that this was my livelihood, how I earn my income, and how I contribute to the family budget. She was shocked, and said, "I didn't realize that!" Sheesh. At first I was amused. Then I was annoyed.

    A few days later, a colleague asked to meet with me, stating we needed to discuss something important. When we met, he asked me to move my practice from my office to his. I politely declined. He kept talking, explaining that he was losing business because he spent so much time out of town. He needed me to run his office, schedule new clients, and grow his business. What about my business and my clients? He told me they wouldn't mind moving. I knew they would. Besides, my office is large, bright, and beautiful. I designed it, and I have a lease. At first I was amused. Then I was annoyed. Finally, I started to worry.

    What was I doing wrong? Was I not working hard enough to present myself in a professional manner? What could I do differently? I went back to the drawing board (so to speak), which happens to be my dining room table. I poured over my mission statement, my business plan, my long term goals, my short term goals, etc. Maybe I needed professional help to evaluate my plans and my approach. Why else would two people minimize my accomplishments?

    Suddenly, I had an epiphany. I wasn't doing anything wrong; I was doing everything right. I was making all my hard work look easy and effortless. It was actually the highest form of praise I could receive. I guess that is another way that you can measure success, when no one else can see the tremendous amount of hard work and sacrifice that goes into being your own boss. Just in case you were wondering, I still love it! And no.....I'm not moving!

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

Bell bottom blues, and learning new skills.

    When we were teenagers, my sister and I used to sew our own clothes. Actually, we made clothes for the entire family. My sister and I were the seamstresses; our mother did the handwork and the finishing. We were quite a team.

    Of course, we each had our strengths, and our specific skills. I was a pretty good little seamstress and fairly accomplished at the Singer. But, for some reason, I was never permitted to sew the zippers into the garments that I was making. Instead, my mother would instruct me to ask my older sister to put the zipper in for me.

    It became a tedious ritual. I would reluctantly hand over the garment to my sister and begrudgingly ask her to sew the zipper in place for me. She in turn would sigh, give a long suffering look, and patiently explain to my mother that I would eventually have to learn to do it myself. Our little ritual was reinforced every time we repeated it.

    One day, I had enough. After all, the zippers came with a complete set of instructions. Surely if I could read and follow pattern instructions, certainly I could put in my own zippers. It was time for me to throw caution to the wind, take the plunge and sew my own zipper in the bell bottoms I was making for myself. You know, the low riding hip hugger type that was so stylish when I was a teenager.

    I announced my intentions to the team. My sister looked grateful. My mother looked skeptical. I looked determined. I stepped up to the Singer, got to work, and meticulously followed the directions. Honestly, it really wasn't that difficult. And I did a great job, if I do say so myself. I proudly showed the finished project to my sister. She looked at it carefully, and complimented me on a job well done. Then she asked why I put it in the pant leg instead of the waistband where it belonged. Sheesh!

    It was one of those funny and silly things that we laughed about for years, and a story that got a lot of mileage. But the life's lesson in this silly story is that it's okay to make mistakes when you are learning new skills. It's important to try new things, and you can't let the fear of failure get in the way. After all, if you are trying, you are learning. If you are learning, you are succeeding. Most of all, don't be afraid to interrupt old habits and patterns to allow for new ones to emerge. That's when the real learning begins.


Be healthy, and keep learning!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP