When spam was ham in a can....

     It took me a long time to embrace modern technology. Three years ago, the only thing I could do on a computer was send and retrieve emails. And even that didn't always go well. Until a few months ago, I didn't even know what spam was. I always thought it was ham in a can. It never did appeal to me, so it made sense when people would use that word with a look of disdain on their face.
    
   I've come a long way, and I am proud to report that I am completely self taught. Which means that I have made a a lot of mistakes along the way. I have unknowingly breached online etiquette, unwittingly looked like a nit wit, and have often appeared downright ridiculous as well as unsophisticated. But, I learned a lot.

    Early in my timid exploration of this form of communication, I was invited to join two online communities. One encouraged participation and dialogue among it's members. I guess the other one didn't, which I discovered after committing an online faux pas by responding to a conversation. Apparently the "conversation" was all one sided, and I was rewarded with a very public, brutal and humiliating verbal attack. Online, of course. My "friend" would never have the nerve to speak to me that way to my face. I was so upset I had to seek professional help. It took a few weeks to realize that I wasn't the one that had the problem, but it still took a while to recover from that. 

    I did recover, and I got back on the horse (or the keyboard) and continued to learn the magic of modern technology. I still make mistakes, and sometimes I make the occasional and unintentional faux pas. I just don't beat myself up over it anymore, nor do I let anyone else do it, either.

    In reality, I really am an old fashioned kind of girl. I prefer face time over screen time. I prefer holding a hand instead of a smartphone. To me the sound of a voice is much sweeter than the sound of a keyboard. Most of all, I prefer a lively conversation rather than the silence of a written response. After all, I can talk faster than I can type, and with a lot less mistakes as well. 

    Besides, I'm also a people person. I love meeting them, talking to them and working with them. It is my life's work. I need to embrace that part of myself just as I continue to embrace this wonderful but often confusing high tech world we live in. 
  
    But, I still do miss the days when spam was ham in a can. Everything just seemed easier back then. 



Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

The Feldenkrais Method(R) and the power of "no"....

    I learned a lot during the four years of my Feldenkrais Training. However, the most valuable thing I learned was from one of my favorite teachers when he veered off course during a group discussion. He did that a lot. He told us a story about an incident that happened when he was a guest teacher at another training program. I love stories, so I settled on my mat in that semi comatose Felden-fog that I would get during training segments.

    He told us that after the first few days of teaching he was aware of some grumbling and the undercurrents of a rebellion brewing. He gathered the class together for a 'family talk" and to give everyone a change to express their concerns. He went around the circle and listened to their complaints, most of them which were directed at him personally. 

    My teacher, the ultimate professional, patiently listened as the complaints against him grew exponentially as they went around the circle. It was as if each student was trying to out do the previous one, and the list of infractions took on a life of it's own. Finally, they got to the end of the circle. My teacher said, "Okay, but I'm not sure everybody had a chance to say everything they wanted to, so let's go around the circle again."  The students really ripped into him the second time.  He thanked them for their feedback. You have to know this guy. I just love him!

    The rest of the two week training went without any further mutinous activity. The students even seemed to warm up to him, but it did take awhile.  At the end of the training, the students told him how much they enjoyed having him as their teacher, how much they learned from him, and asked him to come back for another segment. He just looked at them and said, "No! Forget you!"   

    Okay, that's not exactly what he said, but you get the point. It certainly was enough to jar me out of my dream like state. I bolted up to a sitting position and just sat there, in jaw dropping, eye blinking stunned astonishment. He continued, "Why would I subject myself to that kind of abuse after the way you disrespected me? I don't need this stuff in my life." (Once again, I did some family friendly editing).

    Light bulbs flashed in my brain as a smile slowly came to my face. What a concept! Saying no, setting boundaries, and making decisions based on what you want to do rather than what someone else wants you to do. Did I mention that I love this guy? 

   From that moment on, anytime I was in a situation that wasn't working for me, I remembered that story. I would smile as I imagined myself repeating my teacher's exact words before I simply said, "No." 
    
    At graduation, I hugged my teacher and reminded him of that story and told him that the most valuable thing I learned in the four years was that magic phrase and the power of "no." He hugged me back and said, "Isn't it interesting how we all get what we need from Feldenkrais, and at the precise time that we need it?" That's just one of the many things that I love about Feldenkrais. I just love this Method, and I still love my teacher. I also love the freedom that I have from that one little lesson, the silly little story that taught me the power of "no."   

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP
    

A tale of two neurons....

    I have always had a passion for the biological sciences, but when I experienced my first course in neuroscience, I knew I found my niche. My brain almost squealed with delight. I guess you could say I'm nuts about neurons. I even considered pursuing an advanced degree in neuroscience, but I just couldn't wrap my brain around it, so to speak.

    I couldn't see myself working in a lab all day. I'm more of a people person. But I sure did love the subject. I still do; it's like candy for my brain. But you don't have to be a nerd about neurons to appreciate how our nervous system works. It's a fascinating subject and it's really not that complicated, so I decided to share some of the basics with you. After all, why should the neuroscientists have all the fun?

     Neurons are nerve fibers that receive information from our environment and transmits it to our brain. These are sensory neurons. Our brain processes this information and responds by completing a specific action or movement. These are motor neurons. Sensory and motor neurons communicate to each other and to the neurons in our brain through a series of electrical impulses and chemical reactions, which is really pretty cool when you think about it.

     This reaction is a result from a stimulus in our environment. However, the stimulus must be strong enough to excite the sensory neurons to get the ball rolling. Once the sensory neurons start firing, a specific sensory and motor pathway is activated. Once this pathway has been established, stimulating the same chain of neurons over and over again strengthens and reinforces the pathway. A strong feedback loop is created, and less of a stimulus is required for the same neuronal pathway to be activated.

    This is a type of self education through experience, and explains why we can move through our environment without having to stop and figure out how we are going to move from sitting to standing, standing to walking, walking to running, jumping, playing, dancing....you get the idea. However, neuronal pathways and specific responses doesn't only apply to movement. It also applies in the context of feeling, sensing and thinking as well.

     We have to challenge our neurons and our nervous system to keep it fit and healthy. Engaging in a new physical activity, studying a foreign language, learning to play a musical instrument, reading a variety of literature, or writing yourself are just a few examples how to keep our neurons firing. Like I said, it is a fascinating subject, isn't it?      

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

The Feldenkrais Method, and the true measure of flexibility.....

    It's Feldenkrais Awareness Week, and a special time to celebrate this remarkable man and the Method that he created.

    Moshe Feldenkrais never intentionally set out to develop this unique method of learning through self education. Instead, it slowly and gradually developed from his own personal experience and frustration from trying to heal from a recurrent knee injury. Every time he thought his knee was healed, he would inadvertently re-injure it, often just by stepping off of a curb and landing wrong.

    After consulting with several physicians, he was advised to have his knee surgically repaired, with about a 50% chance of full recovery. He decided the odds were not good enough for him to go under the surgeon's knife, and he chose a different path. That path was the road to self education and self healing, through movement.

    His method is based on the scientific principle of neuroplasticity, which means that our nervous system is inherently malleable and flexible. This flexibility means that we (specifically our brains), are capable of changing and learning new patterns during the course of our entire lifetime. These new patterns are not limited to just physical patterns, but include thinking, sensing and feeling as well as moving.

    One major philosophy of Feldenkrais is that the measure of flexibility does not lie with the flexibility of one's muscles or joints. The true measure of one's flexibility lies within the core of every living being's existence: their nervous system. The ability to adapt to our ever changing environment, to interrupt habitual patterns that are not serving us well, to understand human nature, and the ability to recover from trauma is more than the true measure of flexibility. It is what brings us to the full measure of our human dignity.

    I feel incredibly honored and humbled, to be a Certified Feldenkrais Practitioner and to carry on his legacy and the gift of his remarkable Method. Thank you, Moshe! Happy Feldenkrais Awareness Week!
     

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

Open the gate....and let the learning begin!

   
    During my journey as a Feldenkrais Practitioner, I have had the opportunity to teach to a wide variety of populations in many different and sometimes challenging environments. One of my favorite experiences took place two years ago, when I was invited to teach a workshop for a friend of mine who was also a psychologist who specialized in Equine Therapy.

    It sounded interesting as well as intriguing, so I agreed, even though I reminded my friend that I have very little (if any) experience with horses. He assured me that it didn't matter; he simply wanted me to give a workshop to a small group of his colleagues regarding Feldenkrais. Okey-dokey. Now that is a subject I am comfortable with and have some experience.

    I met the group at my friend's ranch high in the Rocky Mountains. What a perfect learning environment! I guided them through two Awareness Through Movement(R) lessons. After the lessons, we had a discussion regarding our experience as well as how the Method could be applied to the practice of psychology. It was great, and the workshop had concluded. Or so I thought.

    Just when I was gathering up my materials and about to make a graceful exit, I got a surprise. A really big surprise. My friend announced that we were going to take the workshop to the horses. Giddy up. I hadn't planned on that little development. I love animals. I love all animals, including horses. I just prefer to admire them from a distance.

    My apprehension about getting up front and personal with horses was exacerbated by the knowledge that I know nothing about horses except that they are big. I was way out of my league, and I simply didn't know what to do with them. What in the world did this have to do with Feldenkrais, anyway? Since my friend was a highly trained therapist, he was acutely aware of my discomfort, but he erroneously thought I was afraid of the horses. Okay, so maybe he was half right.

    In an attempt to reassure me, he said, "You'll love Jake. He's a really gentle horse. Just don't stand directly behind him, because he'll kick you. And don't let him butt you with his head, because he'll knock you flat. After all, his head weighs twice as much as you do." For some reason, I did not feel reassured. Now I had even more to worry about above and beyond my ineptitude and inexperience with these huge, beautiful beasts.

    I looked for a way out, but there is no back door at a ranch. I took a deep breath and reluctantly followed the small entourage through the gate. Three horses walked toward us, and the biggest one made a bee line right to me. I involuntarily stepped backwards. He stepped forward. We repeated this little routine until I ran out of room and he had me cornered. To take one more step back would have put me up against the electrical fence that I had also been warned about. The horse lowered his head. Uh-oh, here comes the head butt.

    I braced myself. But instead of knocking me over, Jake gently nudged me with his head several times until I finally reached up to pet him. He solemnly looked into my eyes and I felt my nerves and my heart melt. I started to pet him and he pressed his enormous head against my arm, just enough pressure to give me the equivalent of a horse hug, but not enough to knock me over or into the electrical fence. What a sweetheart!

    Satisfied that I was now at ease, Jake backed away and gave me a look. It was time to get to work. I swear he was winking at me. Suddenly I knew exactly what to do and how to progress the lessons and apply it to the horses. A magical transformation took place within me, and information just effortlessly flowed out. I don't know where it came from. I never faltered, and a few times I noticed Jake looking at me and nodding his head. That's when it hit me; which one of us was teaching the class? Suffice it to say, it was a collaborative effort.

    When we were done, I was simply overwhelmed by the experience, and so grateful that I walked through that gate and discovered what was on the other side. I knew I had a new best friend for life. I was even rewarded with horse kisses at the end of the day, which was certainly another new experience for me.

    I said goodbye and drove down the mountain toward home with the smell of horses filling the car, and I had plenty of time to reflect back on that remarkable afternoon of teaching and learning. What a shame it would have been if I had given in to my insecurities and stood on the other side of the gate that day.

    The point is, sometimes you just have to through caution to the wind, step through the gate and see what's on the other side. You never know what experiences are waiting for you. You may even make a new friend or two along the way. I still get all warm and fuzzy when I remember that day and I think about the magic of being with the horses, especially Jake, my new BFF.

    Most of all, I keep returning to the same question that pops into my head after a rich and rewarding teaching experience. Am I learning to teach, or teaching to learn? I'm pretty sure it's a little bit of both. What do you think? 

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT

The Feldenkrais Method(R)....the science and the magic.

   I am passionate about Feldenkrais, and I love being a Feldenkrais Practitioner. My greatest reward is witnessing the magic of this method as it helps my clients improve the quality of their lives. However, my greatest challenge is trying to explain what Feldenkrais is, how it works, and why it is so effective.

    Feldenkrais is not magic; it's science, and is based on the scientific principle of neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity means that we are able to change and learn new things during the course of our entire lifetime. I don't mean the kind of learning that we get from a book, or the kind of learning that we get from school. It's the kind of learning that takes place deep in our nervous system, and it is more of a visceral, organic type of learning that changes our neural pathways, strengthens our neural connections, and actually grows more nerve tissue in our brain.

    Feldenkrais uses the concept of neuroplasticity to access our nervous system in a very gentle but powerful way, through movement. Feldenkrais lessons gently interrupt current patterns and habits through movement explorations, thus allowing for new patterns to emerge. The learning and integration of new patterns are not limited to just movement, but include moving, sensing, thinking and feeling as well.

    What does this mean to you? Perhaps you have chronic back, neck or joint pain. You may have habitual patterns of moving, standing and sitting that may not only be exacerbating your pain, but actually may be causing it in the first place. The Feldenkrais Method(R) can help you discover new movement patterns through your own experience of the movement lessons.

    With Feldenkrais, you can eliminate aches and pains, improve your flexibility, posture, and balance. You can discover new ways of moving effortlessly and more efficiently. You will be able to improve your proficiency in all of your functional and recreational activities, regardless of your age and current level of function.

    It does sound like magic, doesn't it? It is, and it isn't. It is the science of neuroplasticity, and the magic of our nervous system to discover our inner wisdom and realize our full potential. I don't know about you, but it feels like magic to me. The magic of the Feldenkrais Method and the science of neuroplasticity.

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

Bell bottom blues, and learning new skills.

    When we were teenagers, my sister and I used to sew our own clothes. Actually, we made clothes for the entire family. My sister and I were the seamstresses; our mother did the handwork and the finishing. We were quite a team.

    Of course, we each had our strengths, and our specific skills. I was a pretty good little seamstress and fairly accomplished at the Singer. But, for some reason, I was never permitted to sew the zippers into the garments that I was making. Instead, my mother would instruct me to ask my older sister to put the zipper in for me.

    It became a tedious ritual. I would reluctantly hand over the garment to my sister and begrudgingly ask her to sew the zipper in place for me. She in turn would sigh, give a long suffering look, and patiently explain to my mother that I would eventually have to learn to do it myself. Our little ritual was reinforced every time we repeated it.

    One day, I had enough. After all, the zippers came with a complete set of instructions. Surely if I could read and follow pattern instructions, certainly I could put in my own zippers. It was time for me to throw caution to the wind, take the plunge and sew my own zipper in the bell bottoms I was making for myself. You know, the low riding hip hugger type that was so stylish when I was a teenager.

    I announced my intentions to the team. My sister looked grateful. My mother looked skeptical. I looked determined. I stepped up to the Singer, got to work, and meticulously followed the directions. Honestly, it really wasn't that difficult. And I did a great job, if I do say so myself. I proudly showed the finished project to my sister. She looked at it carefully, and complimented me on a job well done. Then she asked why I put it in the pant leg instead of the waistband where it belonged. Sheesh!

    It was one of those funny and silly things that we laughed about for years, and a story that got a lot of mileage. But the life's lesson in this silly story is that it's okay to make mistakes when you are learning new skills. It's important to try new things, and you can't let the fear of failure get in the way. After all, if you are trying, you are learning. If you are learning, you are succeeding. Most of all, don't be afraid to interrupt old habits and patterns to allow for new ones to emerge. That's when the real learning begins.


Be healthy, and keep learning!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

Focus, focus, focus....

    Good grief, I'm exhausted. Every free moment of every day over the past several months have been devoted to my martial arts training. That is my focus right now, like a second job, except without a paycheck. I have eliminated everything else in my life except work and training. I have stopped going to ballet class, stopped socializing with friends, and put projects on hold. I'm not even going shopping. I'm trying to focus.

    I have been organizing notes, reviewing techniques, taking extra classes, and meeting my number one training partner for additional time on the mat. I am memorizing Japanese words and phrases. I am diving into the historical, philosophical and cultural roots of the art I study. I am teaching some classes, helping other students, and collaborating with my fellow student instructors. I am really trying to focus.

    There isn't a lot of extra room in my head for mundane things. I must focus on what is important. Deflect, evade, escape; throw, pin, lock, strike. Hand weapons, heart weapons, spirit and intention is far more critical to remember then where I parked my car. I am testing today for my next belt. This level is a comprehensive review of everything I have learned since my first day of  training. I was told to be prepared to spend three hours on the mat for the test. That seems like a long time, but I'm sure I'll be fine. I just need to focus.

    I'm training and I'm studying. I'm training so hard that I can barely get out of bed in the morning. Every bone in my body aches and my muscles are begging for mercy. I'm studying so much that my head is full of Japanese words and phrases that keep bumping into each other, something that they particularly enjoy doing at three o'clock in the morning. The smell of tiger balm follows me wherever I go, but I guess it's better than the smell of the sweaty guys I've been working out with. The good news is, I'm learning how to focus.

    I am so focused that two days ago I lost my checkbook. No worries, I found it in the ficus tree at my office. Yesterday I misplaced my cell phone. Not a problem; it was in the dog food, right where I left it. I accidentally locked one of my dogs outside, but fortunately heard him barking before I left the house. I got mad at my husband because he wouldn't talk to me before dinner a few nights ago. Then I remembered he was out of town. Focus, focus.

    Every day I train. Every day I study my notes. Every day I wear my little gold earrings that have the Chinese symbol for "courage" on them, even though the art I study is Japanese. I think it's probably okay. Most of all, every day I wonder why I am doing this to myself. I don't have to, and I'm not even sure that I want to. I just want to be normal again. Then I focus at the task at hand.

    I say that I have been working toward this for the past few months. The truth is, I have been working toward this for the past eight years, but I didn't realize it then. Had I been able to look in the future and see where this journey would take me, I would have run screaming into the woods, never to be heard from again. Actually, that almost did happen two years ago, but that's another story.

    I might not get through this test. I might succeed, or I might fail. But that's not the point. The truth is, this test and this level is not about me, or the belt, or the honor of achievement. It's about the journey. It's about the art. The art I didn't choose, but chose me instead. It's about patience and perseverence. It's about humility, and learning how to embrace and accept something that is so much bigger than myself. It's also a way to discover more about myself than I ever knew existed. And it taught me how to focus.

    Well, I'd better be on my way. I have a test to take. If only I can find my car keys. I know they're around here somewhere....focus, focus, focus!

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

The gift.... of three little words.

    I'll never forget the first time I looked into the eyes of a man I barely knew and heard three little words that helped change my life. It wasn't what I was expecting, especially from a man I had just met. We were brought together by a strange twist of fate. I remember standing close to him while he murmured those words in a soft, silky voice that nobody else could possibly hear. But I heard them. I still remember them. And it's not what you think.

    It was in the early days of my martial arts training. That means I was in the first  six months and still not sure what I was doing there and wondering how soon I would quit. But, I was learning a few things, so I kept going to class. Somehow, I was talked into attending a seminar. I was assured that it was great fun, low key, no pressure, and I would have a marvelous time. I was more gullible back then than I am now.

    During the seminar, I found myself paired up with a huge bull of a man. I am good spirited by nature and a natural born flirt, so I was okay with it. At first. Everything changed when I suddenly found myself in the middle of a huge circle surrounded by all of the other students, instructors, and Sensei walking straight toward us. I was the only woman there, I was the center of attention, and everyone was staring at me.

     I froze, like a deer in the headlights. I looked towards the back door to see if I could make a quick get away. Unfortunately, there was a wall of black belts blocking my path. They were lined up next to each other like the ninja version of Red Rover. "Red Rover, Red Rover, we dare Cheryl over!" I was fairly certain I couldn't break through that line. I glanced around for my teacher to bail me out. No help there. I had no way out. Honestly, I was just a heartbeat away from a serious and very public major melt down.

    Terrified, I looked up at my partner. Very softly and quietly he whispered those three magic words, "Don't be intimidated." Easy for him to say. He outweighed me by at least 150 pounds. And he was quite comfortable in this testosterone infested environment.  The circle was closing in tighter and I looked at the back door again. Maybe I could break that line. My partner shook his head slightly and said it again, "Don't be intimidated." All of a sudden, the circle that was closing around me opened up. I got out of my immobilized state and found the courage to start moving again.

    That was eight years ago. The rest, as they say, is history. That man gave me a gift beyond anything he could have imagined, and the support I needed without embarrassing me. It was our little secret.  I can't help but wonder what the outcome would have been if he hadn't been so supportive. Maybe that would have been the end of my martial arts training.

    A few years later I ran into him again at another seminar. He looked at me in surprise and said, "You're still here!" Then he looked down at my belt and burst out laughing. "And you outrank me now!" Later that day we were paired up again. In that same soft voice, he taunted me this time. "Look at you, girl, you're not scared any more. Look at how strong you are." Of course, strong is a relative term. I can't over power a cat. But I have developed a strength of spirit and courage that I never knew I had before, thanks to my training.

    Words can have a powerful effect. It's important to choose your words carefully. Speak softly, honestly and gently. You may be giving someone a powerful gift that keeps on giving. After all, you never know when you may be in need of some encouragement. Recycle the gift.

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov. PT, GCFP

Reddy Kilowatt meets Mr. Sparky

    When I was a little girl, I did what a lot of kids do out of interest and curiosity when the opportunity arises. I took a hairpin and stuck it in an electrical outlet. I wasn't a fast learner in a lot of life's experiences, mostly because of my incomparable stubbornness. I figured if something didn't go my way the first time I tried it, I'd do it again until I got the outcome I wanted.

    However, the shock I got was a pretty immediate and lasting learning experience. I never did that again. I also learned that the cute and sparky little fellow that represented our power company had a mean streak. And one heck of a bite. For years, we all remembered the day that Reddy Kilowatt bit me.
       
    Here it is, over fifty years later, and I am having electrical issues again. We have known for a long time that our wiring was outdated and not up to code. We had an electrician tell us several years ago that we needed to rewire the entire house. Okay, we knew we would get around to it, someday. But we didn't worry about it too much, until the day I watched as flames shot out of a neighbor's fuse box. So, the electrician had a point.

    Enter, Mr. Sparky. No, I'm not kidding. That's the name of the company that we hired. Actually, I hired them to do two small jobs. That changed when he opened our fuse box. The two small jobs evolved into a major (and expensive) project. He showed us what the problem was, and where we had already had two burns. Again, visions of flames shooting out of the neighbor's fuse box and the power of Reddy Kilowatt flashed in my mind. It was time to git 'er done.

    It took three visits and a team of electricians to get the work done. At least I had an idea of why it cost so much. On the second day, they started changing the old outlets and pig tailing the wires. Whatever that means. One of the electricians saved an outlet to show us what it looked like. She told us, "This was a bad one." The top half of the top outlet was black and the plastic had melted away. It looked like Reddy Kilowatt was messing with me again.

    Anyway, Mr. Sparky took charge of my childhood nemesis.  He got control of that zippy little rascal, reigned him in and got him hog tied. Or pigtailed. You get the idea. The important thing is that the work is finally completed, and my home is safe. It was an expensive home improvement project that no one can see, and only we can appreciate. But it beats flames shooting out of your fuse box. And at least all of the new wall plates look pretty.

    Funny, I was writing this post while Mr. Sparky was putting the final touches on the new wiring. I had finished the story and noticed that I was having a problem saving it. It seems Mr. Sparky had cut off the power to my computer and I lost the entire post. I think Reddy Kilowatt was the culprit, just letting me know that he still has some power over me.

    I saved the burned outlet. I might have it made into a necklace. Or maybe I can use it for the grown up version of show and tell. I will keep it as a reminder to enjoy a major home improvement project that no one can see. And as a gentle reminder to listen the next time some one tells me I have a problem with my wiring. I'll apply the life's lesson that I learned as a child. Which is that just because Reddy Kilowatt is cute, he still needs to be respected.
     
        At this point I have to put a plug in for Mr. Sparky, so to speak. They do a great job. So, if you are in the Denver area and looking to have some work done, keep them in mind. Their team of electricians are very professional, respectful, friendly, always on time and clean up after themselves. Even better, one of the electricians was a girl. That in itself made Reddy Kilowatt shake in his hot little yellow boots. What more could I ask for?

     So, that's the story of the day that Reddy Kilowatt met Mr. Sparky. It looks like my old nemesis had met his match. It wasn't exactly a match made in heaven, but at least sparks aren't flying.

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

Live and learn....

    What a wonderful weekend I'm having! It started last night with a fantastic instructor training class at Kusa Dojo. Okay, so it was a bit difficult to get to the dojo on a gloriously beautiful spring evening, especially being Friday evening and everything. To make matters worse, I had to maneuver around all the revelers getting an early start on their St. Patrick's Day celebrations at the local pub. But it certainly was worth the effort. It's amazing how much you can learn about how you move when you really slow things down, listen to the quality of your movement, and go back to the basics. Oh, and it also helps to have two highly skilled teachers coaching you.

    I was able to find where I was making my mistakes and now have the opportunity to work on them, on my own, without judgment, but in the spirit of interest and curiosity. When I practice on my own, I can slow down my movement patterns even more so I can interrupt the habits I have developed that are holding me back. In the context of learning, slowing down and doing less helps you feel more. I could feel new synaptic connections developing in my head. You'd think I'd be exhausted after that, but I was strangely energized as I picked my way around the party goers from the pub after class. Hmmm....this sounds really familiar, like something else I know.

    I didn't think my weekend could get any better after last night. Until this morning, when I taught a two hour Feldenkrais workshop at my office. Watching my students discover new movement patterns as they moved slowly through the lessons was fascinating. And extremely rewarding. Listening to their experiences of the movement lessons was incredibly enlightening as I felt more synaptic connections making contact in myself. And I could once again appreciate the close relationship between  martial arts and The Feldenkrais Method. What fun!

    So, it begs the question, both from the perspective as a student and as a teacher....am I teaching to learn or learning to teach? I think they go hand in hand, and are reversible, just like one of the principles of learning in the Feldenkrais way. Recently I was explaining the principles of Feldenkrais to a friend of mine. I explained how it was based on the science of neuroplasticity, that we are always able to learn new things during our entire lifetime. She responded by saying she was too old to learn new things, and she meant it. I felt sorry for her, because that is part of her belief system and her self image. Not only is that sad, but just think of all the fun she's missing out on!

    Anyway, it's been a great weekend, full of wonderful experiences and discovery! And just think....it's only Saturday afternoon. Who knows what the rest of the weekend has in store!

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

Surrounded by brilliance....and neuroplasticity.

    Don't you just love it when the gifts keep coming? Just as I am still marveling at my Sensei's brilliance two weeks ago in martial arts,  I got another blast of brilliance from my ballet mistress.

    Dancers are visual as well as kinestetic in our learning experiences. We use our eyes as well as our bodies to learn choreography in our technique classes. We look in the mirror to check our placement as well as our movement patterns. However, sometimes we depend on the use of our eyes and the mirrors too much. For example, if we know we can look in the mirror and follow the other dancers, there is less pressure to learn the combinations. We can become complacent, and fall into the habit of watching each other instead of paying attention to the choreography.

    Last week our teacher gave us a specific constraint. She had us turn away from the mirror and dance facing the wall. The results were disastrous! Half of us couldn't remember the combination, and the other half were running into each other in a bizarre rendition of ballerina bumper cars. It was extremely confusing, but pretty funny. And incredibly revealing. It seems that some of us depend on our vision (and each other) a little too much.

    The dancers who had embraced the choreography as an authentic, internal expression of themselves regained their composure relatively quickly. The others never recovered. Some of them actually stopped and simply stood there, adding to the confusion. It became obvious which dancers were trying to do what they thought they should do, rather than feeling what they could do.

     As dancers we often talk about flexibility. Sometimes we become consumed with the idea of having a flexible body. Perhaps instead of being preoccupied with having a flexible body, we can instead focus on developing a flexible mind. If we did that, who knows to what heights we can climb?

    When our teacher had us turn away from the mirror she challenged our nervous systems to quickly adapt to the change. And we all discovered a little bit more about ourselves. Sometimes all we have to do to is turn away from the mirror to see ourselves more clearly. And sometimes, out of confusion comes clarity, flexibility, strength and grace. Not always....but it is an intriguing concept, isn't it? And well worth exploring.

    Oh, and one last thought. Don't you think I am incredibly lucky to be surrounded by such brilliant teachers? Or maybe their brilliance has been there all along, but now I have the awareness and flexibilty to appreciate it. Hmmm....it's just another idea to consider.

Be healthy, and flexible!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

Gymnastics with numbers....and thanking a teacher.

    I love math. It's so simple and so logical. I also have passion for movement.  Math is movement. It's gymnastics with numbers. Isn't that a fun way to look at it?

    I didn't always feel this way. When I was young, I didn't do very well in math. I used to feel incredibly stupid, clumsy and frustrated. Everyone else seemed to understand and catch on so easily, where I always struggled. It did not help that I was told I had no aptitude for math, or even worse, that I just didn't apply myself or work hard enough. Ouch.

    I remember being in Algebra class when I was in high school. I was trying to follow along with the new material my teacher was presenting, but I was lost. Utterly, completely and hopelessly lost. Finally, I raised my hand and said, "I'm confused." The straight A student sitting next to me rolled her eyes and said in a bored, sarcastic voice, "Well, that's not very hard to do!" I was stunned. The entire class looked at me as my face burned with the knowledge that yes, I am stupid. I have no aptitude for math. I don't apply myself. I don't work hard enough. Give up.

       My teacher slowly turned away from the blackboard. He said nothing....he just looked at my classmate for a few moments. Her face turned red and she started to squirm. I don't think she intended for the entire class to hear her. My teacher looked at me and asked, "Where are you confused?" He then patiently explained the equations to me. Suddenly other hands shot up in the air. Hmmm....it appears that I wasn't the only one who was confused. But I was the only one who had the courage to admit it.

    Many years later, I decided to go back to school and earn my Master's Degree in physical therapy. But then I found out I would have to take several math courses including Statistics, College Algebra, and Trigonometry. The old internal monologue and self talk came back loud and clear. I'm not smart enough. I have no aptitude for math. I don't apply myself. I don't work hard enough. Give up. The truth is, I almost quit before I even started.

    But then something incredible happened. Somewhere deep in my memory, I saw a young teacher turn away from the chalkboard, give my classmate a blank look, and take the time to explain the material that I didn't understand. That memory helped change my belief system that I had no aptitude for math. I knew I could at least try. There is no doubt that I would work hard and apply myself. I could start with lower level classes, join a study group, and even hire a tutor if necessary.

    You know what? I never did join a study group or hire a tutor. After the first two weeks of high anxiety and introductory Algebra, I made an amazing discovery. It wasn't difficult....it was interesting and kind of fun. I was good at it. And I loved it! I was at the top of every class I took, all the way up to Calculus.

   Isn't it fascinating that such a small gesture could change my belief system and self image? How could I go from being completely inept in a subject to a high achiever without even struggling? Because, in just an instant, my teacher turned what was a hostile, high stress environment into one that was safe, supportive and conducive to learning, without judgment. The intelligence of my nervous system and my own inner wisdom was able to take over and do the rest. This teacher gave me a way to find my confidence, dignity and self respect.

    Honestly, is it ever too late to thank a teacher? I don't think so, do you?

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

Habits, constraints, and neuroplasticity....let the learning begin!

    In my martial arts class, we often practice something called "randori". One student stands in the center of the room while the other students form a circle around them and take turns randomly attacking the person in the middle. It's kind of like the Ninja version of monkey in the middle. And it scares me to death. It is my least favorite training activity, but my incomparable stubborness won't let me opt out. And besides, the guys would make fun of me if I refused to play with them.

    Last week, after we completed our randori, just as I heaved a sigh of relief, Sensei said, "We're going again." He looked at me and said, "And you are not allowed to do the same techniques. I want you to find new ways to react to each attack." My response to that constraint was not very mature or Ninja-like. I threw a hissy fit.  Apparently my little temper tantrum didn't phase him. Either he is immune to them or I need to work on my hissy fit skills. Anyway, he wouldn't budge. Sheesh, I thought I was stubborn!

    Before we began, he had me stop, breathe and relax. Not an easy task when you are surrounded by men waiting to attack you. Against my better judgment, I listened to him. Then I took my place in the middle of the circle and let the games begin. The attacks started coming. And something very interesting happened. I felt new movement patterns come forth without even trying. My reactions were more thoughtful, meticulous and less effort. I discovered that I had a lot more techniques under my belt (so to speak) than I knew I had. I was calmer, my breathing was easier, my chest felt softer, my movements were more fluid. I felt myself responding in a visceral, organic way. 

    By giving me that one small constraint,  my Sensei gave me the opportunity to interrupt my habits,  explore new movement patterns, and discover new sensory patterns.  He did this in an environment that was safe, supportive and non-judgmental. What ever I did, it was not right or wrong, good or bad, just opportunities to learn. Hmmm....this sounds familiar. Why does this sound like  Feldenkrais? Because it is. The Feldenkrais Method(R) gives us the opportunity to learn new patterns of moving, sensing, thinking and feeling in an environment that is safe, supportive and nonjudgmental. Interesting, isn't it?

     What Sensei did that day was absolutely brilliant! But let's keep that to ourselves, shall we? We won't tell him I said that. After all, if I encourage him, who knows what devious new methods he will use to help me learn and grow. Hmmm....on second thought, maybe I will tell him!

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

What I learned on my summer vacation.

    During my three day long summer vacation I helped my niece with her summer project. (See post dated 9/19/11). This incredible experience was rich with learning opportunities. Not only for my niece, but also for myself. And my sister. What did I learn?

    First of all, never underestimate the difficulty of a 5th grader's summer project. Be careful about being too confident. Don't say to yourself, "How hard could it possibly be?" You are about to find out! Summer projects for 5th graders can be incredibly challenging, difficult and time consuming.

    Second, adult confidence can be easily shattered by a 5th grade project. When that happens, it's best to step back, take a few breaths and remember that you are the adult. If your confidence is suffering, imagine how the ten year old feels. I discovered if I treated the entire experience as an exercise in mental gymnastics, the project became more fun than work. As a bonus, neither one of us became stuck and were able to keep focused on the experience of the process, not the final goal. That helped keep my stress levels under control. I can't speak for my niece, but if my stress levels were low, I'm guessing hers were as well. Consequently, if I started to panic, I'm betting she would, too.

    Third, find a way to create an environment of support.  Ask questions, initiate open ended discussions, share ideas, but keep your personal biases to yourself. This gives your child the space and freedom to allow their creative energy to flow. It might be tempting to take over and do most of the project yourself, or superimpose your own ideas. But, where's the sport in that? And what does the child learn from that experience?

    Fourth, you can't allow exhaustion and the looming deadline to get the best of you. Stop. Take a break, take a walk, use your eye drops, but keep thinking and talking about the project. Once you unleash the creative genius in a ten year old, there's no stopping her. Her creativity and her energy are limitless. I also discovered how supportive an eight year old brother can be when his sister is faced with a difficult task. I always knew my nephew was exceptional, but his patience, maturity and support as my niece and I spent hours working at the dining room table was very touching.

    Fifth, I learned how much fun it is to read the same book as a ten year old and talk about it together. I also discovered that nothing is impossible when you work together as a team.

    Finally, I learned that I will ask ahead of time if any projects are on the agenda are so I can read the book in advance.

     My sister learned that when her children are entering a new school, the "Welcome Package" isn't always 100% complete. Sometimes a small bit of information may be missing, like the fact that her child has 2 mandatory projects over the summer. She learned that her sister rocks, but she already knew that! Oh, and she also learned how to duck when a golf ball comes flying at her. But that's another story. I'm just glad she has quick reflexes.

    The truth is, we encounter rich and rewarding learning opportunities every day of our lives. We can ignore them, grumble about them, or refuse to participate in them. We need to recognize these opportunities, honor them, revel in them, and make each one count. We may be surprised by what we learn!

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP

What I did on my summer vacation.

    When I visited my sister and her kids two months ago, I was recruited to help my young niece with her summer project. Unfortunately, my sister had just found out that my niece had two mandatory projects over the summer. What the other kids had all summer to complete, my niece had about a week. And I had three days to help her. I was up to the task. After all, she is only ten years old and starting the 5th grade. I have a master's degree. How hard could it be?

    The first day, my niece sat me down at the dining room table. She explained that she was required to develop a board game based on the book she had read. Okay, that seemed a little challenging, but again, how hard could it be? Another sister had already bought all of the supplies. My niece had finished the book the night before. I was looking at a blank board game, unmarked play money, blank white cards (what were those for, I wondered) and a blank white book that we were to somehow turn into a "Rule Book." I was clueless on how to begin, but confident I could help her pull this together.

    I asked my niece to give me a book review so we could get started. She began to enthusiastically tell me about the book. I was getting confused. I asked her a few questions. She answered them, and my confusion got worse.  As my confusion grew, I noticed her face starting to fall as she watched the expression on my face. Her voice became less animated and more uncertain as she started to look worried. My own confidence was beginning to falter, so I changed tactics. I picked up the book and told her, "You just give me an hour alone and I will speed read this baby. Then we can talk about it and get a better idea of how to get started."  That was fine with her and she ran off to relax with a little bit of television.

    I started to read. Fifteen minutes later my head was swimming. There were so many characters introduced in the first two chapters that I couldn't keep them straight. I began taking notes. Thirty minutes later I was getting a headache. Forty five minutes later it was time to go pick up my nephew at his baseball camp. I took the book and read in the car. Good thing I wasn't the one driving. We watched my nephew play ball. I yelled and cheered just enough to embarrass him while I read the book. We took the kids to lunch. I took the book to lunch. I was in serious trouble. This little project was proving to be a whole lot harder than I had anticipated.

    By the middle of the second day, I was halfway through the book and was able to begin to talk about the story and the characters with my niece. We started planning our strategy for the board game, including ideas for the Rule Book. I figured we would tackle the money and the blank white cards later. Since I felt I had a good grasp of the story line, the characters, and already figured out the ending, I was done reading the book. I checked that off of my to do list, and we spent the next few hours discussing ideas as my niece drew several drafts on paper.
   
    Confident once again that I had the situation under control, my niece and I discussed the story as she showed me what her ideas were. During the discussion she dropped a bombshell regarding what happens during the second half of the book. "What?" I exclaimed. "Oooops," she replied, "I don't want to ruin the story for you." Well, she didn't ruin the story, but she did ruin my day. Sighing, I told her to stop working. The new twist in the book wasn't going to work with the rough draft she had started. I picked up the book again and started reading. She went to relax with a bit of television. Where were the other adults? They were hard at work on the golf course. Of course.

    I finally finished the book the next morning. My niece and I spent the entire next day working on the project. She put the finishing touches on it just before we adults went to dinner that evening.


     Viola! She and I had done what I thought was impossible. We finished the project in 3 days. Of course, we spent at least 8 hours each day working together, not counting the extra time that I was reading the book or thinking about the project.

    My husband and I left the next morning before anyone else got up. Exhausted, the characters of "The Westing Game" were still swirling in my head as we went to the airport. My husband got an upgrade, which he generously gave to me. As I settled comfortably in United's business class, I had to smile. Out of all the summer vacations I have ever had, this one was the best!


    The finished project:

Be healthy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT GCFP

Don't worry....be happy!

    I recently found myself engaged in a conversation where I was suddenly and unexpectedly asked to name 3 things that made me happy.

    This question was presented to me after I had just completed a 3 day Advanced Feldenkrais Training with Russell Delman, a highly respected Feldenkrais Trainer who presented his work "The Embodied Life"TM. His work incorporates deep personal introspection along with gentle self inquiry. Oooo, what perfect timing! I took the question very seriously and slowly began to consider my response, giving it the thoughtful consideration it deserved, accepting the question on a deep philosophical level. After all, what is happiness? What does it mean, "to be happy''? Does it come from an external source, or from somewhere deep within ourselves?

    My silence startled my "conversation companion", who came to the immediate (and erroneous) conclusion that I was sad, unhappy, and/or lonely. She had expected me to give a knee-jerk response listing the people and the things that made me happy, as if my happiness must be someone else's responsibility, and not my own. Now, that did make me sad. I realized that so many of us have unrealistic demands on our friends, family, co-workers, and personal possessions to make us happy. It's a habit or pattern of expectation that has been reinforced over the years and the major roadblock (in my opinion) to understanding our true selves, our needs, our dreams, and our pathway to health and happiness.       

    For myself, the question is not "what makes me happy", but "when do I feel happy"?  Learning new things, meeting new people, being in service to others, having quiet time to myself, spending time with my husband, hiking in the mountains, going to ballet class, listening to my wind chimes, watching my dogs play, and a thousand other things give me an indescribable sense of joy and happiness.

    Let me ask you....when do you feel happy? It is an interesting question, and when approached in the spirit of personal introspection and non-judgemental self inquiry, you may be happily surprised what comes up for you.

 Be healthy, and happy!
Cheryl Ilov, PT, GCFP